EXACTLY

 

True story.

Losing myself

To be honest, i feel super sad today. I feel like I’m actually disappearing slowly from here and i do not have any idea where this is leading. So much pain but i believe  in every pain there is a healing to follow Had such a good time at church this morning and the sermon was really good; it really speaks right into my heart. I must confess i have been making the same prayer over something for quite some time yet the situation hasn’t changed yet. It must either be the incense bowl is not filled or it is a no. I tried hard thinking that it will never be a no, but today i realized even if its a no from God, He’d give me His strength to walk thru this dark phase in my life once again. And today as the Pastor prays tears streamed down my face, i felt released and all burdens were lifted away. And it comes to my mind to always have trust in God for He knows what’s best for me. I believe God spoke to me, to tell me to always have faith in Him. I totally feel it today simply because i did one of the biggest mistakes in my life last Friday and am starting to feel like trash for a bit but today’s service totally made my day and makes me feel less trashy It may sound ridiculous to all of you who don’t believe in what i just confessed but to me it totally renewed my faith in God. I’m really glad i woke up for church albeit having only 4 hours of sleep.

But I’m more glad to be able to wake up everyday to my wonderful brunch with my brother. Sometimes we tend to focus on a big picture where we totally forget that we should count every little blessings in life. I think i’ll feel happier if i start noticing people who have always been there for me even when i looked away and ignored them completely. Happiness is a choice and it happens everyday. Happiness is when you walked passed that particular candy store and start craving for their overpriced Caramel Macadamia Nut Popcorn. Yums! Happiness is when you stop caring about what others think about your weight. Happiness is when you’re so determined to get an ink and mummy’s threatening seems so bearable Happiness is when you start letting go of grudges and count your tiny blessings in life.

and all the smiley faces you’re about to see

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I’d really sit down and listen to you play

New cover from my fave duo The lyrics makes me feel so warm

When I look into your eyes
It’s like watching the night sky
Or a beautiful sunrise
There’s so much they hold
And just like them old stars
I see that you’ve come so far
To be right where you are
How old is your soul?

I won’t give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I’m giving you all my love
I’m still looking up

And when you’re needing your space
To do some navigating
I’ll be here patiently waiting
To see what you find

‘Cause even the stars they burn
Some even fall to the earth
We’ve got a lot to learn
God knows we’re worth it
No, I won’t give up

I don’t wanna be someone who walks away so easily
I’m here to stay and make the difference that I can make
Our differences they do a lot to teach us how to use
The tools and gifts we got yeah, we got a lot at stake
And in the end, you’re still my friend at least we did intend
For us to work we didn’t break, we didn’t burn
We had to learn how to bend without the world caving in
I had to learn what I’ve got, and what I’m not
And who I am

I won’t give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I’m giving you all my love
I’m still looking up
Still looking up.

I won’t give up on us (no I’m not giving up)
God knows I’m tough enough (I am tough, I am loved)
We’ve got a lot to learn (we’re alive, we are loved)
God knows we’re worth it (and we’re worth it)

I won’t give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I’m giving you all my love
I’m still looking up

I doubt

 

Haven’t been interested in chinese songs for the longest time ever but this is one of my favorites ever since

Love you you　我像孤獨的漁夫
說不出　愛的溫度
很想給你幸福　你卻自我保護
轉彎處　只剩下潮汐之外的荒蕪

love you you　卻在海裡迷了路
找不出　心的歸屬
思念越嘗越苦　心跳亂了腳步
怎麼我　讀不懂你唇語之間的無助

就算用盡所有真心　卻到不了你的心底
回憶難以靠近　你是我奢求的唯一
讓我用盡所有力氣　只要你相信
我最堅持的聲音
只剩一句　love you you stay with me

能不能別這樣放棄　能不能就放開自己
海浪穿透我的傷心　請聽一聽愛的聲音

Love doesn’t learn

 

It feels a little uneasy knowing that he is gonna party tonight at Calvin Harris’ remix while I’m gonna be at home, cleaning and arranging my almost exploding wardrobe. It shouldn’t bother me at all, knowing that no love was found in between here or there and more important is in between us. But the thought of him wanting to get me ticket makes me crack a smile

this kind of 1000 watts smile

i’ve been having a bad day but i guess this time around he turned it upside down again.

 

 

 

You turned away when i look you in the eyes

 

Boyce avenue’s cover of Fix You by Coldplay playing in the background while i try to really settle down and try my best not to panic for Friday’s exam. I’m in my second last week of internship already! YAY! At first it was pure torture but in God’s mercy things just got better Anyway, yes I’m quite emotional lately. Firstly because i lost ALL MY CRABS but i am considering if i want to rare salt water fishes now. I KNOW RIGHT, bringing my love for pets to the next level.

Bought new mirror for my room too , gave away my old clothes, threw away papers, useless stuffs and made NO SHOPPING my very first new year resolution.

Anyway, not gonna party this weekend in KL. So, peeps drink and dance for me Gonna be away for this long weekend and i’ve decided to not on roaming for a few days and simply just really be away. Also, this is a test to you to see if i matter this much. Long ago, i’ve already known the exact answer but i’d always want to remind you that there are some people who would truly care, if you would just let them

Have a lovely weekend xx